Edi said “yes Ayesha” when I sent her an email if I could just pick up where I left off with my Schizophrenia Autobiography I wrote in her two Memoir classes and so I will. My goal is to have 100 typed written pages by Labor Day weekend 2016 around when we have our 2nd meeting of the new NJCU Writers Workshop! I am writing my memoir. Ayesha’s Story is the title of my book (my book length memoir). It should be 200 pages at least but maybe more. The structure may change but as it is Part One is 100 pages, Part Two is 50 + pages and Part Three is 50 + pages. (Edi said “Ayesha” the structure may change).
This Saturday June 18, 2016 is my poetry event for the 22nd Annual New Jersey Wordsmith competition that I am a winner of. I think my poem My Enemy may have won 2nd place in the wordsmith competition this year. Back in June 2012 I was the star of the 2012 AAMH client awards dinner. I had two poems typed up on poster boards and on easels. I read my poems on the stage or at the podium four years ago this month. I love being a poet!
What I heard yesterday on Star 99.1 FM on the radio had to do with accepting and being yourself. I’ve said many times that I am the person I want to be. I wouldn’t want to be someone or something I’m not. I really can say that I like myself. I have a positive self image. I am thankful to God that I like myself. I know I’d still be that broken fragile self conscious girl I used to be as a teenager if it weren’t for the supernatural Love and Healing from Jesus Christ!
My Success Story is in MCCC News “Alumna Ayesha Karim Circles Back to College That Launched Her”! I am so happy. I remember going to the AD Bldg this January on the first day of classes for the Spring 2016 semester and meeting Miss Wendy who took down my answers to the questions she asked me. Miss Wendy basically transcribed my Mercer alumna success story. I go back to work at Mercer in August ’16 as a Mentor for the DREAM program. My success story is now on Mercer’s website!
At every level there’s a new bunch of haters ready to yap about me. I have come so far from where I was just 5 years ago. My self image is good. I smile in my bedroom mirror after I put on my lipstick. I am a Memoir alumna. I am a member of NJCU Memoir, a closed group on Facebook. I got in to Cave Canem twice: Fall 2014 and Fall 2015. I went once in Fall 2015. I had such an amazing experience at Cave Canem. The other women made me feel like I was a part of the fourteen woman group poetry workshop. I don’t care if I’m not popular or anybody’s favorite person. I like my life and I like myself. I’ve had some successes in Poetry and Writing Memoirs and now I’m writing a Young Adult novel called, Girl Meets Boy.
Maddy Monheit a board member of NAMI and a member of the NAMI Mercer newsletter staff did a story on me for this month’s (June 2016) newsletter. There’s a nice headshot of me, Ayesha Karim, and it says:poet and volunteer. I am so happy that I am in the spotlight this month. I have volunteered with NAMI Mercer since December 2010 the first time a woman at NAMI Mercer NJ, Erika Reading, asked me if I would run a Just Friends social group event, the Bowling and Pizza event. The Bowling and Pizza event is the first Saturday of every month unless there’s a reason for some other special event to be on that first Saturday of the month.
I want to live. I don’t want to die until I’m in my 80s. I like who I am. People give me and other women like me who struggle with mental health problems every reason to not like ourselves. Liking yourself is a revolutionary act in a society that gives you and others who have various disabilities every reason to have a poor self image. I put on my Tropic pink Fashion Fair lipstick and I smile in my mirror. I buy nice dresses for myself and other times I wear nice pantsuits. Years ago I had a job interview and my mom bought me a black Lane Bryant pant suit that I loved. I have a nice red jumpsuit in my size. I wear a 2X and an XXL. There is this 3/4 length mink coat in brown in The Fur Vault at Macys that costs like $5,100 that I want! I love fur, leather and Le Vian chocolate diamonds.