TheAyeshaSite

I learned that it’s better to be nice somebody. Thinking about the power of kindness and positive thinking makes me feel like I’m doing all the right things. I remember how rude certain people were to me. I feel like mean-spirited people ruin things for other people for a reason. I’m a happy person. I’ve had a lot of nice breaks in my life. I’m not the happiest person but I remind myself to smile when I have successes so I am able to enjoy things. You only get your one life. I’m trying to live more at the moment than thinking about the future. I like the present moment a lot more than planning too far into the future. I’m taking it one day at a time.

I remember my kindergarten teacher Chiquita. She was beautiful. She was a sophisticated lady too. She came into my thoughts today. She smelled like Newport cigarettes and perfume. I loved her smell. I always take a shower once in the morning and spray perfume on my neck. I want to become a kindergarten teacher. I will soon. I have two years or so to finish my second Bachelor’s degree in Early Childhood Education.

I’ve had many successes and I can honestly say that it’s great to be where I am now and embrace being unique (myself). I don’t think I ever felt like it was as easy to be me but now it’s effortless and it’s good to be Ayesha Karim now. Being me was always good but it took time for me to see and say yeah “I’m Ayesha Karim. I’m a black girl.” I felt like I was kind of used to watching and seeing other people do cool things and have successes way before I ever had successes of my own. I love being me in my 30s. I’ll be 38 next week and here I am. Having success in my 30s feels really good. I feel like this is my best decade ever. There’s nothing I’d really change or do differently. Life is sweet as a ripe strawberry!

Every time I think of how so many good attractive women go and change their appearance to look more white I feel on the verge of tears. Changing yourself is never a good thing to do. You were already unique and attractive. Why change yourself?

There are things I can do when I feel sad. I can take a walk in the park with a friend. I can go to a dance class. I can color at home in one of my adult coloring books. Doing things when I’m sad helps me to feel better. I took a wellness recovery action plan class several times and it really helped me to feel better. I plan to take the course again just to have an action plan of what I need to do. Drawing and coloring and writing are big on my list. I’d try biking too. I’d be open to canoeing and kayaking now too. I feel like trying things I never thought I’d try before. I may be interested in learning how to play the guitar too.

Wow what a way to start 2019! Check out Stuart’s blog y’all.

Interesting facts about me

I smoked for twenty years from age 13 to age 33. I experimented with cigarettes at age 12. I started smoking on the roof of my old apartment building in 1994. I do drink wine and wine coolers to celebrate once in a while. This coming July 2019 will mark five years smoke-free for me. I love adult coloring and art.

I nominate the following blogs

1. Nirant Gurav
2. Neha Kulkarni
3. My Life Aspects
4. Laleh Chini
5. Indianeskitchen
6. Sumit Official
7. Kim 881
8. positivesideofcoin
9. Whinney

My questions to you are:

1. How many times have you felt an intuitive voice telling you something and didn’t listen to the voice?
2. Do you love aquariums?
3. Do you ever go to the Jersey Shore?
4. What’s your favorite restaurant?
5. Do you like art?
6. Do you like music?
7. Do you read for pleasure?
8. Who are your favorite authors?

I found my happy place with pursuing my goals and getting out there more. That is where I am and I feel like I’m finding my happy place. Believe me this is something that didn’t just happen along the way. It’s something I had to do. When I walk I know I never walk alone. My life was never easy. I try to be very careful and I get anxious.Yesterday I was on Facebook and a new friend commented on my post I felt validated again especially when I’ll add he’s older and he volunteers for NAMI, the organization I volunteer for. I love NAMI. I feel like organizations like NAMI give mental health consumers a place to volunteer and quality of life. When I volunteered to co-facilitate a support group called Connection I did it to stay connected. Mental illness is hard without peers that understand the nature of the illness. No one else really understands.

I feel so excited about my blog now that I have over 110 followers. My thoughts and feelings have been validated by so many blogger friends on http://www.wordpress.com where we all have our blogs published. I feel like I can do almost anything now.I am so thankful to you guys. I always felt alone going through my illness. I have had a part-time job for three years. I love my job. I’m a Mentor for the DREAM program at Mercer for students with intellectual disabilities. It’s one of the first jobs I’ve had that I really enjoy. I have to take the Praxis Core. I have to study to be able to pass the test. I need to work on my studying because test day is the last Saturday in January. My 38th birthday is coming up. I’m looking forward to it!

I am able to sleep at night with my meds. If I need a good night’s sleep and I have trouble sleeping I always feel really tired until I can get some sleep. I am able to sleep since my early 30s. I always had trouble sleeping since I was a little girl. I know I need my sleep to function. I need four or five hours the night before to function and get up and go out where I have to go. If I get four or five hours of sleep I can so anything I have to do the next day. I can function on four or five hours of sleep. I like to sleep until about 7 am or 8 am when I usually wake up in the morning. I like to get up early and get on the internet. I always have breakfast.

I’m a newbie writer. I’m celebrating four years of blogging today. I write because I just love to write. I write because people seem to like what I write and it creates a bond with my readers. I feel so interconnected with readers of my blog that I am happy I started blogging. I used to feel all alone or like I was all by myself before I shared my writings with people and to my surprise people love my writing. I’m kind of into over sharing too. I like to be able to share my story with as many people as I can. If people are interested I feel overcome with happiness. I had 100 copies of my poetry chapbook and now I have like 70 or 80 copies left to sell. I’m anxious to sell all of the copies but I’m running out of people to ask and waiting to see if the ten people I asked recently happen to respond. Writing is the only thing I get pleasure from in my life. Writing is something I can do alone and connect to people. I just love writing!