TheAyeshaSite

Pretend games
Black children play
Overgrown women
needing an escape
marijuana
Poems of escapism
School bullying
I signed the banner at Mercer
Where I alumna Ayesha Karim
circle back to work as Mentor
The ways the kids got high needing
an escape
I tell all of them
I don’t smoke
I remember how all of the dreams
I was dreaming seemed to lose their meaning
I will continue to hold on to my faith
I know a lot more than I did before
If I grew up playing rope in the park
or on my great aunt’s block
with telephone wire
We used to play rope I am sure
I will always be beautiful too.

I will drink more water. I will start walking for exercise with a walking buddy. I will treat myself to a chiropractic adjustment once a month. I’ve been going to a chiropractor since I was about 25 years old and it has helped me a lot. I will walk off belly fat in 2019.

I am wishing all of the bloggers on http://www.wordpress.com a Happy Prosperous New Year. I had a good year. I feel good. I am able to get sleep most nights. Sometimes cares keep me up that I want to be able to put to bed. I have faith in God. Faith in God carries me through difficult experiences. I know I’m connected to God and all of my new friends on http://www.wordpress.com. To all of you guys following TheAyeshaSite and to other bloggers on http://www.wordpress.com that may become interested, happy new year 2019 and thank you.

I have goals. I try. I fail. I succeed. I know what I did because of my errors. I just know that I could never have learned if not from my mistakes. I take all my life lessons as teachable moments. I won’t give up. I’m a life-long learner. I have to be careful how I treat people. I’m okay. I can do a lot of things. I can do all things through Christ that strengthens me. I am more than capable. I have gotten to a point in my life where I see the totality of my experience and I’m seeing my personal growth. It’s easy to see the error in the other person all of the time. I see my successes and all of the cool things that happened to me after age 30 and I say Ayesha it wasn’t easy but being nominated for two blogger awards is very cool. Happy new year to me!

There were a lot of times in my life where I felt like it was hard for me to be myself. I felt wierd, awkward and self conscious. I didn’t feel like I fit in or belonged anywhere. I know now that was the way it was and that was the way it had to be. Now four years and two blogger award nominations later I feel like everything is cool. I feel like I have found my happy place again. I know God on high is watching me saying “Ayesha you are not alone, I am guiding you and I love you and approve of you.”

I don’t feel guilty about anything. I am enjoying this period in my life where I am nominated for not one but two blogger awards and have this platform with TheAyeshaSite my blog. I feel so grateful for this success at 37 years old. I feel like this feels right. It is right perfect timing. I am feeling good today. I’m going out soon. I have some things to buy for myself. I want to start driving by early next year. I want to buy my first car. I am going to save for a down payment.

I like myself. I know people have certain opinions about me. I’m guessing they always will. I’ve never been a popular person. I got a chance to do a solo here on http://www.wordpress.com and it’s because of my 100 followers. Thank you 100 followers you helped me so much by liking blog posts I made and saying y’all like my blog. I had my first experience where I felt supported in a blogging community as a writer. This is always going to be something I remember.

Ayesha you are cool too. You have overcome many obstacles and are doing well. Two blogger award nominations is something to really smile about. Enjoy your day. Don’t dwell on anything that might bring you down today.

I say I’m a proud nerd. I’m not trying to be accepted by anybody and two blogging award nominations is a big deal. This is me. I encourage my readers Embrace the YOU and know that you are beautiful too.

It is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. I find that it’s better to have had a nice relationship and to remember I had a nice relationship even if that relationship didn’t work out. I kind of know what’s left will always be in a photograph for me to smile and be able to remember.