My voices are so cruel and hateful when they are angry.

Sometimes I remember turning thirty and becoming the Black girl with blue eyes or clear eyes. Ever since I developed a dry eye problem I have tried to use Clear Eyes eye lubricant for my gorgeous dark brown dry eyes. I have a little cousin named Jackson who was born on September 29 whose 5th birthday is coming up. His mother Chanel who is my younger first cousin and she said to Jax “oh look Jackson has dark brown eyes just like Ayesha”. Sometimes I think of Edi and feel so happy to be working on my memoir (book length project). I also remember Old Brooklyn and how all the kids were verbally abusive to me and think of moving to New Jersey starting high school and having a light skinned girl say “Ayesha you’re pretty to be dark skinned”. She thought I was pretty but she also encouraged me to get chesnut brown contacts. My family told me “Ayesha no get clear contacts you have such clear eyes get clear contacts”.

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I am a Black Guyanese woman. I'm thirty nine years old. I went back to college to take Early Childhood Education classes. I want to get a second 48-credit BA degree in Early Childhood Education by 2021. I go to NJCU. I have a BA in Creative Writing from NJCU. I graduated from NJCU in August 2015. I transferred to NJCU from Mercer. I have my AA degree from Mercer in Humanities and Social Science since May 2007. I write poems, I write memoirs, I'm a blogger and I am taking a children's lit course. I love reading memoirs. I also do book reviews from time to time. My favorite poet is Emily Dickinson. I grew up in Ewing, New Jersey. I live in Princeton Junction with my parents!

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