I am about 270-275lbs. I like myself. I accept myself just as a I am. Not when I get to my goal weight even though I want to lose weight and not when I get an MFA degree or become more successful. I accept who I am the way I am, right now. Even if I only want to lose 60 or 70 pounds if I lose 20 and start walking I’ll feel better and just say if I don’t lose weight I am still gorgeous and worthy of love. I am worth knowing and loving just the way I am!
I have three composition notebooks filled with Process Journal entries of what will go into my book length memoir, Memories of Me. This is my schizophrenia autobiography I’m writing about my life from about age 13 or 14 to my 30s. I have come so far from where I used to be, too far from where I started from. It hasn’t always been easy but I would not say I had a hard life, just the opposite. I had access to more opportunities including being a memoir alumna and going to three Memoirfests in a row: December 2014. May 2015 and December 2015 at Edi Giunta’s house in Teaneck, NJ. Edi gave me many opportunities and invited me to follow her on Twitter and when I was taking Memoir with her she invited me to join NJCU Memoir a closed group on Facebook.
Vania and I had a phone interview last week. Next Monday at either 2pm or 3pm I hope we can meet at NJCU for a face-to-face interview in which Vania can ask me the other set of questions she has! I hope Vania gets enough information from me to get an A on her paper for Edi Giunta’s Spring 2016 Women in Literature class. Vania said she would send me a copy of her finished paper for her Women in Lit class. I am so glad Vania was interested in memoirs written by women with Schizophrenia, like me, Ayesha Karim and English alumna!
One of Edi’s students, Vania wants to interview me. She has an interest in memoirs written by women about their lives living with Schizophrenia. Edi sent me and Vania an email connecting us and I sent Vania an email that I was very interested in being interviewed. I told Vania a little bit about myself. I will wait for her to respond to the email I sent her a few minutes ago.
I think it may be a great idea to have a memoir that has three parts…Part One, Part Two and Part Three. Memories of Me is my working title for my book length memoir about my life having been diagnosed with Schizophrenia from the age of fourteen to my present age of thirty five (twenty one years of suffering). Part three will be the past five years of my life and how well I’ve felt most days and how well I’ve been doing for the past five years. Part one will be about early onset of Schizophrenia and life from maybe age 13 to age 19 when I stopped seeing Dr. Lavinson in 2000. Part two will be about my 20s living with my mental illness and what my life was like then.
I got an email from Edi Giunta yesterday. A student of hers (as I once was) would like to interview me for her essay for her Women in Lit class. She has been looking for memoirs written by women diagnosed with Schizophrenia(that’s me). Edi asked if I was interested and I replied “Really? Oh thank you Edi for contacting me” “yes of course I am interested”. I’m excited! I just got the email from Edi yesterday.
I am planning to write my book length memoir, Memories of Me, by the age of 40. I will read The Art of Slow Writing by Louise DeSalvo and The Art of Memoir by Mar Karr. Mary Karr has written like four or five New York Times Best-Selling memoirs. I found out she teaches at Syracuse in their MFA program in Creative Writing. I love Poetry and I love Memoir!